Everyone needs compassion
And love that never fails
Let mercy fall on me

When everyone needs forgiveness
Kindness of the Saviour
The Hope of the nation

Saviour, He can move the mountains
My God is mighty to save
He is mighty to save
Forever author of salvation
He rose and conquered the grave
Jesus conquered the grave

So take me as you find me
All my fears and failures
Fill my life again
I give my life to follow
Everything that i believe in
Now i surrender

Shine a light in and
let the whole world see
Singing, for the glory of the risen king
Jesus, Shine a light and
let the whole world see
Singing for the glory of the risen king

Ephraim, Yi Qin, Qin-Qin, Ben-ben. That's ME! God have given me an interesting personality. I'm a sanguine, in another word, an extrovert. I love to be around people. Some people accused that i'm lame. Well, i do find myself guilty, sometimes. Of course, at times, you will find me in very deep thoughts. I'm created to be thinker too. Sometimes i think too much and can be rather emotions-driven. Curious about my love life? Well, the love of my life is God! I love gorry, bloody and gruesome movies and thrillers, such as SAW 1,2,3 ; Mindhunter; When a stranger calls etc. Jazz musics are pleasing to my ears. Buildiing a strong and biblical guys group to win the world is my vision!

-12:39 AM

wow.. time really flies man! when i look into my post, then did i realised that it has almost been one week since i updated haha!

As i serve Him and grow in Him everyday, i'm TRULY convicted that being a christian is NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER NEVER boring!!!!!!!! Everyday is just so exciting! I am no longer just living for me, myself and i. But i am living for others; for Him! I am not just on earth to take in oxygen and give out carbon dioxide and take part in the whole process called decomposition! I am here for a greater purpose and calling! And the amazing thing is that.... SO ARE YOU!!!! You are not here for nth, but for everything that God has planned you to be! Salvation is here!!! =)

Anyway, past week have been really great! Thursday had an mcg, after which we went to have dinner at rc to look for ben! On that night, it was another night that i got to run around like some crazy man! I need to print some photos at around 9pm to make a card for someone special to me. But most shop closes very early. And that nite, i when to dennis house to make the card together till around 4am! Super tiring! haha. But that's what we call 'The Extra Mile Love!"

Sat we had our ESS!!! Though we didnt have a great harvest last week, this week, EAST D1 gotta rock heaven man! haha! After that went to celebrate Joy's (my 'mum') birthday at this place in city hall which sells all deserts at 50% discount!!! Had a great time there laughing at one another and just enjoying one another presence! That's what community is all about- Making do nothing happening! =)


That's mY 'mum'!!! same birthday as my real mum! haha =P

Sun is the highlight of the week! 2 extremes occurred- one super happy; one super saddening (shan't share here =( ). It was my mum's birthday!!!!22 July!!! Yeah!!! it was really a memorable celebration of her birthday! That night me, my sis, and my mum order some food and just talk and talk and talk...... We talked about our family history to church ministry.... to even ghost story! haha. Really fun man!!!


a snapshot of my mum while she was packing our stuffs to get ready to move to new house!
(no wonder she look shocked! HAHAHA! =p)

My sister! Acting cute haha! They were busy packing, and i'm there, going around to take pics haha!


-12:32 AM

"hey, just want to ask, do you hate your dad?" he asked with pure innonence, without any intention to hurt me.

But, all i could say, was simply,"erm..........."

Perhaps some of you didnt know that, my parents divorced a few years back. It wasn't something that i never expected. In the matter of fact, since i was young, i always question myself "Will dad and mum divorced?"

Since i was still a young boy, i have always witness how my parents quarrelled over stupid stuffs, like my mum bringing us to swimming. I have always prepared myself for the worse. But the truth is that, when that day finally came, no amount of preparation would be able to prevent the scars.

That few months was indeed not too easy for me. i remembered numerous nights where i was laying on my bed, listening to them quarrelling outside, but could not do anything at all. Nothing at all. All i could do, was to cry and questioned God, "Why me? Why me? WHY ME???!!!!"

Silence was all i received. He didnt answer my question. He didnt explain to me why did i have to go thru all these! Neither did he send angels to comfort me! However, what i experienced was definately more than enough; more than i ever deserved.

Like what i said, he didnt explained to me anything. But what he did was just- being with me. Those nights that i lied on my bed and cried out to him, i was not alone. He was all the while there, embracing me into his big and warmth arms of love, comforting me like a father coaxing a his child. I can never explained how it felt like exactly, but it was just awesome!!!

He didnt just sent me his presence, but he also gave me a great family to cling on to! My spiritual family-yhope! Many people were there for me. Peopel like dennis, apinun, star, and especially my ex-shepherd-bing liang, who always tries to be there for me whenever i needed him! They were literally angels sent by God to me! (though too ugly to be angels haha =P) That's why i really really really really thank God for blessing me with such a GREAT bunch of people in yhope!

Seriuosly, i really dun know who will i become, or what i be doing now, if it wasnt God who picked me up from the miry clay and set me feet on solid rock. And honestly, my answer to the his question, was a simple "No." It is really from the bottom of my heart that i do not hate my dad. If you ask me why, it was simply becoz of God's love in my life! If he were to ask me the same question few years back, when i do not have God's love in life, i will comfirm HATE him to the CORE! I'm dead serious about that! I will freaking hate him for what he has done to the family-my sis, my mum, and myself.

But becos i have now experienced God's love, i can be able to say with full confidence that i still love him. Though i do not know where he is now, what he is doing right now, i really hope that one day, i will be able to meet him and share to him about God's love. He needs it more than anyone!

"What will you do if he's ..... dead?" He asked with great caution.

This was my answer " I would want to be there, by his bedside, sharing to him about how God have changed my life, before he's dead. Though he left a scar in my heart, i will still want him to be in heaven with me. I do not have a wholesome family on earth. But, when i'm in heaven, the least i would want- a family reunion."


-10:33 PM

haha... didnt really have the energy to blog too long.

Now feeling rather sick. Since morning, i can SENSE that i'm going to fall sick. It's not physcologically, but it's just that you will know it when your body is going to fall ill. Body aches, slight flu, feeling feverish. HOPEFULLY is not DENGUE!!!!!!!! ARRHHHH!!!! Kana stung by a mosquitoe that really look like a.....

aedes mosquito!!!!!!!!!! help me GOD!!!!! arrr!!!!!

anyway, today had a mcg. we had 3 visitors!!!!! Yeah!!!! To EAST D1: Hey guys! thank god for your effort today! I know many of us have tried our best in calling your friends down, but kana rejected a lot too. It's ok! You have done your best! Also, i think everyone did really great in helping to connect with the visitors! We talked to them and make them feel welcome. thanks! Let's continue to work towards 20 by and August!! By faith!!! Amen?! =)

Just to let you all know, my next week will be more taxing. Currently, i have 3 projects on my hands , and the deadlines are drawing nearer each day! And all are done in groups. meaning, we will need even more meetings and co-ordination!!! MADNESS!!!! So do keep me in prayer that i'll continue to stay close with God, and hear from him! =)

Just to share something that i learnt this week:
You can have a skillful hands, and a sincere heart to learn and to serve god. But what's more important is to have a pure hands and a pure heart, so that God's anointing and blessings will be overflowing in your life! take carez. jia you for CG08!!! =)


-1:58 AM

Big Daddy Weave - Every Time I Breathe
From the album: Every Time I Breathe

I am sure all of heaven’s heard me cry
As I tell You all the reasons why
This life is just too hard

But day by day
Without failI’m finding everything I need
And everything that You are
To me

Chorus:
Every time I breathe You seem a little bit closer
I never want to leave
I want to stay in Your warm embrace
Oh basking in the glory shining from Your face
And every time I get another glimpse of Your heart
I realize it’s true
That You are so marvelous God
And I am so in love with You

Now how could I after knowing One so great
Respond to You in any way
That’s less than all I have to give
But by Your grace I want to love You not with what I say
But everydayIn a way that my life is lived

Chorus:

Wrapped in Your mercy I want to live and never leave
I am held by how humble
Yet overwhelmed by Your majesty
Captured by grace and now I’m finding I am free
You are marvelous God
And knowing You is everything

Chorus:



-1:28 AM

My 3 blisters have really tortured me like MAD!!! i have never in my whole entire life kana THREE blisters at one goal! 1 at the right left (big toe there), 2 on left (one at big toe, one and the last toe). Seriously, zong 4D also not so zhun! Walking was so so so so so hard already man!

When i reached home, the first thing i did was to burst open the 2 biggest one. they were at the big toes! But i was so stupid!!! i forgot that i should do it after i bath!!!! ARRH! Therefore, i when into the toilet and the thing i did was..... OOOUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!
This was due to the FLESH of my foot was exposed to the water!! Just imagine your open flesh got soaked into water!!! OUCH!!!!!! My mum suggested that pasting a plaster may cease the pain. But.....
OOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It was NO BETTER!!!

In the end, i had to take a chair into the toilet and sit on it while bathing, so as to ensure my flesh is not exposed to TOO much water. It was a torture man! And it just dawned upon me that what i was going through was perhaps 5% of what jesus had beared for my sins! i was just so amazed at that moment. In the same way how jesus suffered for sins of all man kind, i hope that my little suffer may bring salvations to the 7 of them man! Amen! =)


-12:03 AM

Today God blessed me in a very interesting way. I was at Blk 800+ bus stop waiting for bus 293. I was listening to a podcast when i saw these 2 junyuan lower sec guys. God prompted me to approached them, but i was....simply.....lazy! haha. i boarded the bus and realised that they were right behind me. But i just acted as if i didnt see them. Then at the next stop, a springfield guy board the bus! I CHOOSE to ignore him too. The excuse that i gave was that he looks plump! OMG!!! I"M SO SINFUL!!! *sob sob...... (I repented le! =/ )

Soon, the bus was turning into the Blk 700+ area. As i browse through the view outside, i saw that there were a bunch of SPRINGFIELD LOWER SEC GUYS at the basketball court!!!! Honestly, my very first thought was " I see nothing, God!" Then God prompted me to alight at the next stop and get to know them. But i was so scared as i dun not have any surveys or paper with me! Thus, i started to reasoned out with God, telling him all the excuses why i shouldnt go down. But god gave me the ultimate question- DO YOU REALLY WANT TO SEE SPRINGFIELD GROW?!

"...y..e...s....", i replied with tons of guilt and fear, as i already gave up on the previous 3 guys.
" Show it through your actions then!" God simply put it across.
i was totally dumbfounded. =X. In the end, at the moment when the door almost closed, i quickly rushed out of the bus before i turn back on my words. =1

As i walked towards the basketball court, i was thinking of how to approached them as i was not equipped with surveys and papers. So upon reaching, i sat at one of the side-benches thinking of what other ways. I was looking at them playing when suddenly the ball flew past me and one of them ran towards my direction. God prompted me to asked that guy whether i can join them, but i was questioning god whether it's the right time. So........ i gave it a pass! But the truth is that when you are in God's plan, you can't run away! The ball flew past me the second time and this time round, i knew i got to ask!!!

"Hey, can i join you all? Since you all are playing 3 vs 4." they all looked at one another and then agreed! (just for info, i dun really play bb= i cant really play well!) HEEZ.... So i joined them to play, 'barefooted-ly'. Guess what? within 10min into game, i realised i had 2 BLISTER on both my foot!!!! (at end of game, i had 3!!!) OMG!!! it's freaking painful!!!!! So i had to wear my slippers and run, which was so uncomfortable! ARRH!!!

However, in the end of the day, I got all their no!!!! hahaz. they were all very responsive, esp 5 of them!!!! We sat down after the game and just talked and slack! SO COOL! Really thank God man!!!!! 7 contacts!!!! WAH! =)

Hey guys and galz! Sometimes, we may be afraid to do certain things for God. And i wanna congrats you! Cos it's perfectly NORMAL!!!! Sometimes serving god is just so scary as we always got to step out of our comfort zone and face the unknown! But, what differentiate normal christians from christians who do great things for God is that though they fear, they are willing to simply take another step of faith and say "God, though i'm scared, here i am, use me!!!"

During this CG08, you can choose to just let it be another evangelism activity. But of cos, you can also choose to let it be the most memorable period of your life, by choosing to step out in faith and do things that you nv try before; going to places where no man have gone before! The choice is up to you. Hope to see you at the end of the race man! take care, jia you!=)


-12:27 AM

Wow! you really have patience! haha. Cos there was another test of my commitment to my another sheep, aloy.

As we were riding halfway thru, he was sharing about tml he got to be at rc at 11am for housekeeping. Initially, when he asked me whether i can go, i told him i cant. becos the next day, at 2.30pm i have to attend Combined Team Rally (CTM); after that Dennis meeting the ULs; and then celebrating apinun's birthday. So it will be a long day for me and i didnt want to be a 'walking zombie' on sun! after explaining myself, he just replied with a "orh, then nvm lor". I didnt really realised anything wrong until i noticed that he was rather quiet for quite soemtime.

So i went up to him and asked whether everything is alright. Though he said he's ok, it was obvious that he wasnt! So i asked again, and in fact he felt a little 'unfair', saying "You all so good. no need to wake up early. Only i need to wake up early to do housekeeping." After listening to him, i told him that i'll be at rc at 11am to do housekeeping with you. Though at first he rejected my help, i insisted on coming down. But guess what?.... My heart was crying out "NO!!!!!!!!!" haha... anyway, i still went down the next day!

But the whole journey to rc was really a tough mind battle! before i leave the house, i was thinking "should i go down? i haven sleep for whole day le. i'll be a zombie later leh....And he dun really need me afterall since there will be others helping him. And he........." All sorts of reasons were bombarding my mind all the way from my house till on bus 291 to rc. even on the bus 291, i was thinking of just letting the bus turn back to interchange and i'll take a bus back home to sleep.

The truth is that all the reasonings that came to me mind were REAL REASONS! It was not excuses. i was really DEAD tired! I really had the right to not go for the housekeeping as there were really the housekeeping team to be there to clean! HOWEVER, i really wanted to show aloy that i am committed to him as a shepherd, leader and friend!

At the end of the day, i arrived at rc and realised that housekeeping is cancelled! hahaha! What a joke man! Of cos, I still went for all the meetings. But, everyone who met me knew somthing's wrong with me. I was not the 'active and crappy' yi qin. I was tired. The fatigue even affected me till monday!

even so, i didnt regretted! Becos i was really convicted of what i did- committment to my sheep! =)


-12:45 AM

Being the teachers of the word is really not easy man. God will surely test you in what ever that you teach. continue to stay tune and you will know why....

I was teaching my group on thursday about 'how to love your neighbours', and the 2 main points were 'Love despite personal differences' and 'Love despite inconvenience'. God is really quick enough to act!

Love despite personal differences....
on sat, alfonso invited this guy who approached him at interchange for Flag-day. so on my way to meet them, i was asking aloy how was this guy. His reply was "err... later you come you take over. You come and see and you will know liao..." In my mind i was thinking "wah... got so bad ar?" so i went to meet them with a great sense of expectation of what is to come! =)

When i reach somerset and met up with them, i was surprised to see a rather tall and plump guy wearing a blue t-shirt and black shorts. On his waist was a bulky looking pounch and he was carrying a backpack, being pull up to the max, and holding a big yellow umbrella and 2 newspapers on both his hands. The scene was rather funny haha. So i asked aloy whether he was the ONE, and he nodded, with a cheeky grin on his face. I went up to him and talked to him and in the end, took care of him during service. He was one of those people that really made me dun know what to do to him!

during praise, he was looking around and even turned and talked to a guy visitor behind him that happened to be in the same school (simei ITE) as him. The people around him knew the visitor felt uncomfortable, but we/ i cant do anything! Cos he ignored me when i tried to asked him turnback first. But the worse has yet to come!!! During sermon, he fell asleep and.... he.... SNORED!!!!!!!! I tried to coughly loudly to just to wake him up whenever he started snoring. But it was useless. I almost vomitted while coughing! Then i tried to shake my legs to vibrate him. But, no use sia! In the end, I simply woke him up!!! haha =p

Anyway, this wasnt his fault actually. Cos he has lower IQ and simply, he's slower than many of us. he's 21 years old, but still in ITE. Yet, God still use him to test me whether i can love peopel who are different from me. Well, how to i scored?.... I think i scored not too bad. cos i didnt really felt irritated or impatient with him! I was, in fact, very patient with him and really geninuely cared and talked to him! YEAH!!!

Love despite inconvenience...
"true love cost; true love hurts; and true love empties ourselves..." How true man! On the very same day, some of the East D2 guys are going to night cycling with a few transferred brothers to catch up with them. bing liang asked my grp who want to join them.

Actually i wasnt very keen in going as i dun really see any point in going. And... i need to meet my own grads that have been transferred to catch up with them too. By the time i finished meeting them, it will be like around 11 plus, 12 plus already. By then, i will be SUPER tired. But then........ my sheep, brendon, said that he wants to join them. As a good leader, a good shepherd, i dun wanna him to be the only East D1 to be there.
Making things worse, the bike rental shop closes at 9.30pm. This means that if i cant be there by 9.30pm, i will need to borrow bikes from my friends. The struggle in my mind was really intense!!! Haiz.... to cut it short, in the end.... i decided to go for both =)

Now that i decided to go for it, i need to ask around to borrow 2 bikes. One for me, another for aloy, who decided to accompanied me. [thanks aloy! =)] within 2 hours, i almost asked close to 20 people just for 2 bicylces! Bill comfirmed explode! but i had no choice. or else, how to go find them at sepang bedok ( Simei ITE there)?! In the end, i went through a lot of hardships to just find that 2 bikes!!!! (shall not elaborate, but thanks pei chyi and wei xiong! =0) By the time everything was settles, it was already 1 plus!!! I was really DEAD tired!!!! And i still got to cycle from Tampines blk 864 to sepang bedok, which i dun even know exactly where!!! The thought of cycling there and try to locate the place really pushed me to give up. but I already promised brendon i'll be there. therefore, i persevered and we went to meet them up and for the whole night, we cycled from sepang bedok to Changi village, and then back to tampines and took a bus back home. Stinky and 'dead', i FINALLY reached home at 9.30am!!!!!!!!!! FREAKING TIRED!!!!!!!!!

While bathing, i questioned myself. Why did i do all these? Is it just becos i want to be a man of my words? or is it becos i dun wanna abandon brendon there?.....
Conclusion: simply becos..... I really love him as my sheep! That's why i didnt want to leave him alone there, and i want to be there with him! This was really one of the toughest test that God made me went thru to test how much i really love my people....
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You think that's ALL?!?!
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read on if you have the patience.
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aloy

benjamin

star

ruilin

shane

Pastor Shirley

Pastor Ben

Paster jeff

jasmine

yi hao

vanessa

ying jie

ben

denise

joyce

jacq

gideon

jooneo

gwen

EAST!!!

nicholas

geck ting

joleen

benjamin(new)

glen

prana

dennis loh

ah-be

joy

corrine may

impact communication

archives

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